WE'RE GOING TO GET HIM!!!!!!!

We received official word.  The wait is over.  We're going!!!!!!

We can hardly believe it.  However this is real.  We have an appointment at the US Embassy next Thursday. 

So many plans to be made.  Lots to do.  SO EXCITED!  He's finally gonna come home!

Thank you for your prayers to get us this far.  Please continue to pray us through.

Stay tuned here for more updates in the coming days and weeks.  This journey is just getting started!!!!

Update 11/22: Operation Ivy

Back in my younger days, I was pretty big into metal and then punk.  There was a band way back when called Operation Ivy.  They had a song called Knowledge.  It's not an amazingly well written song, and I'm not linking anything here because they drop the F bomb....and more importantly because the song itself has nothing to do with anything relevant to this blog.....EXCEPT.....I started singing the chorus to it this morning.

All I know is that I don't know
All I know is that I don't know nothing
All I know is that I don't know
All I know is that I don't know nothing

Beyond the grammatical error (it's punk, come on)....this is pretty much what we have to share with you this week.

It seems that we have been asked by everyone this week what we know, and when are you going, and why's it taking so long.

Friends, we don't know when we're going.  We thought we'd know by now.  Heck we thought we'd be there and home already.  We're not.  We don't.

There have been some delays.  The Embassy has asked that some things be re-done.  It's completely out of our hands.  There's nothing for us to do physically.  Some pieces need to fall into place to make this happen.  We have an inkling that it's moving forward, but we can't put a time table on anything.

We promise that when we know something we will be shouting it from the mountains.  You will know.  We will post here, blast e-mails, post on Facebook and Twitter.  You will know.

As for now....

All I know is that I don't know
All I know is that I don't know nothing.



Prayers appreciated.  As frustrated as you might be with these setbacks, know that we are more so.

News Update and Thoughts 11/16

So this week there was an interview at the US Embassy in Addis Ababa on our behalf.  When others have had this type of interview the Embassy has cleared them to bring their child home within 24 hours.  Some, within 2 or 4 hours.   So we totally expected to wake up Tuesday morning to an e-mail from the Embassy telling us that we had cleared and come pick up E.

We didn't get that e-mail on Tuesday.
or Wednesday.

We heard that there was a mis-translated date on one of our papers and that that was re-submitted on Wedneday and we should hear Thursday morning.

Sure enough we got an e-mail Thursday morning.....but it was NOT the e-mail we were expecting.  This email said that some other pieces of paperwork needed fixed.  This will take a few more days to get all those together.

So we wait again.


Marjorie was reminded this week while reading Tobiah his nightly Bible story, that Jesus waited days before he went to his friend Lazarus so that God's glory would be shown.

God show your glory in our story too.  This was your plan from day one, not ours.  If we need to wait a little more, then His plan is going to pretty awesome on the back end. 

Nesting and Cocooning

Most pregnant women go through "nesting"  to prepare for their child.  The idea of "nesting" has actually been studied and there's some evidence that lead some to believe it's an actual instinctual behavior much like birds.  The need to get things ready, to fix and clean things.

I can tell you, without a shadow of a doubt in my mind, that nesting is not limited to pregnancy.  With each of our adoptions Marjorie has nested.  I mean MONTHS ahead of any possible time a child could come home, she's getting things out, putting up decorations, getting out blankets, and toys and clothes.  We have to get ready.  She couldn't wait for me to help set up the crib, no it had to be done months ago, and all the blankets she and others made for Elias went immediately into the crib. Little toddler toys were out weeks ago. 

But there's something else that is written about in the adoption community-it's a little different.   Cocooning.  Cocooning is a period of time where intense care and bonding happen.  The idea is to kind of close up social shop and just spend very very intentional time with your new child.

If we're honest, we weren't the best Cocooners with Corban.  We were new to parenting and adoption.  We didn't realize how much one on one time he needed with us.  We didn't do horribly....but we could've done better.  We didn't want to say no to people when they asked if they could stop over to see him....or just showed up at our door.  They had waited with us too.  He needed way more alone time to adjust to being a family and new stimulation.  Once when our parents were visiting, Corban had enough of visitors, so he took Marjorie's hand and led her to his room.  What he wanted was to sit in the rocker with her for awhile and have alone time.  So she did that with him till he was ready to visit again.  With Tobiah we had a week alone with him in the isolation room at the hospital, so it happened naturally.  

We are preparing you now for cocooning.  When Elias comes home, be prepared to see us less.  We are going to be bonding with our child, meeting his every need as best we can, making up for the past 2 years, growing trust and making sure he knows we are here for him.  Just because he is home, doesn't mean he is prepared for all the new things in his life.  He needs time to adjust to a lot of new things.

We will be limiting visitors.  Elias might not go on all the outings right away, like to the store or library or church with us right away.  We might need to miss some events and large gatherings.   Please understand and respect that as we move forward. We'll be coming out of our cocoon slowly and tentatively, trying out the new surroundings and sometimes retreating.  This time for him could last anywhere from 2-6 months.

We can't wait for you to see him!  We know you've waited and prayed for him to come home for a long time.  We'll make sure to post pictures, so you too can rejoice in him being home.
And while we need to be the primary caregivers for Elias, we'll need breaks too, to refresh from intensive parenting.  Thanks for supporting us in this stage of our adoption journey as well!

News Update 11/2: Bipolar

The adoption process can be incredibly bi-polar.

A few days ago, I was in a very dark mood.  Frustrated.  Angry.  Bitter.  Ready to get on a plane and go do something about it.  Within the last 20 minutes, things got resolved, and several blessings fell into our laps.

It is so hard to be even keeled.  It's hard to keep your emotions in check.  It feels like you are on a roller coaster.

So what has happened is this:  Last week we saw signs of movement.  Lots of friends who cleared court with us back in August, got cleared by the Embassy and are traveling.  We heard from the Embassy that they wanted to interview a lady involved with our case who lives in the town E is from (Awassa).  So our agency needed to find her and set up the interview.  As of yesterday they still hadn't found her and I was getting upset.  Because, while Ethiopia isn't the United States....there are resources in place that would facilitate this faster...at least I believed so.  So I was incredibly frustrated and ready to fly over and find her myself (with the help of some friends).

Then I got an e-mail from our agency.  They found her.  She has her interview at the Embassy November 12.  What has been happening lately, is that the Embassy then clears the child (E) to come home within 24 hours of that and gives us potential dates to travel.

Let me be clear:  That's what has been happening lately, but that is NOT a guarantee for us.


Then my mom called me.  My parents have asked if we need a new car seat for E.  We said yes but we'd like one of the detachable ones with the booster so we don't have to keep buying stuff.  So my mom went looking and couldn't find what she wanted, got frustrated and went home.  Only to have a neighbor, come to her door with a near brand new one that she had for her grandson.  She GAVE it to my mom because she's moving and can't take it!


Also.....If you notice we hit our 2000 dollar goal that we set for this next trip!!!!!!  Some friends helped us over the last little hump and we're there!!!!  Thank you God for working in the lives of friends and family to help us get to where we are! We have been super blessed by you all.  A simple Thank You can not do justice to our gratitude and humbleness through this whole process.

So we're done then right?  Well.......sort of......

If you've been following regularly you'll remember that back in June we had a post called Gray Area.  We talked about how we had a rough idea what things were going to cost, but until we actually go and do, it's hard to hammer that down to the exact dollar.  So on one hand we're pretty sure we won't need more money from our trip....we can't say that with 100% certainty.  We still might need to purchase tickets last minute and pay more than we want.  We just don't know......but we've met our initial goal.

HOWEVER....any money that is raised that we don't need will be donated to BRING LOVE IN.  We've talked about them in the past.  We love them and what they're doing.  We're excited to partner with them in what they're doing.  If you're unfamiliar with them, you need to check out what they're doing.

So within 20 minutes we got an Embassy interview date.  We got a free car seat and we reached our goal.  How do I change my emotions that quickly?

Thank you God for blessing us yet again!

FOR YOU:

1.  We are still coveting your prayers.  We need the Embassy to clear us on or about the 12th of November.  We really want E to be home now.  While we see that we're taking baby steps forward.....we're not done yet.

2.  Pray for us as we attempt to handle this bipolar ride of adoption.

Psalm 62....Wait in Silence.

I taught the teens last night out of Psalm 46. I reminded them that the Psalms were song lyrics. That it's like opening up a CD case and pulling out the liner.

If you hurry you can download Robbie Seay's EP Psalms vol.1 free from Noisetrade. Do it now. I'll wait. What are you still reading for...you're suppose to be downloading.  Good.  Now that we have that done, we can proceed.

This EP has been rocking my world.  I have had it on loop.  Particularly track 2....which is Psalm 62.   I'm going to put the actual Psalm here for you and the the Youtube video (for those who are rebels who can't follow directions and just download the album to their computer).  If you wanna read first and listen later, or listen first and then read or if you're able to do both.  Then scroll down for some final thoughts.

62 My soul waits in silence for God only;
From Him is my salvation.
² He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be greatly shaken.

³ How long will you assail a man,
That you may murder him, all of you,
Like a leaning wall, like a tottering fence?
⁴ They have counseled only to thrust him down from his high position;
They delight in falsehood;
They bless with ^[b]their mouth,
But inwardly they curse. ^[c]Selah.

⁵ My soul, wait in silence for God only,
For my hope is from Him.
⁶ He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
⁷ On God my salvation and my glory rest;
The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
⁸ Trust in Him at all times, O people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us. Selah.

⁹ Men of low degree are only vanity and men of rank are a lie;
In the balances they go up;
They are together lighter than breath.
¹⁰ Do not trust in oppression
And do not ^[d]vainly hope in robbery;
If riches increase, do not set your heart upon them.

^11 [e]Once God has spoken;
^[f]Twice I have heard this:
That power belongs to God;
¹² And lovingkindness is Yours, O Lord,
For You recompense a man according to his work.

Wait in silence.  Yeah we're all really good at that.  Right?

I don't want to be silent.  I want my son to come home.  I want to yell.  I want to cry out.  I want to shake my fist in anger and frustration.  Nothing anyone can say will justify my boy being anywhere but in my house.  I don't want to be silent.  I want to quit my job and move to Ethiopia so my son can live with me.

I am reminded that God is my refuge.  Where would I be without knowing that there's a bigger plan that I don't see....and might never.

Trust in Him at all times......and wait.

Wait.  Wait in silence.  I need to work on that.

Frustration and News 10/11

I had planned to write a post for this week no matter what.  Earlier this week, I thought that it would have a much different tone, than I'm able to write with right now.  I'm not good at it, but I'll try hard to not tell a story and instead cut to the chase.  Long story short.  That sort of thing.  Trust me, this is the SHORT version.

The past week has been rough.  Really rough.

There's a document we needed to fill out.  To do so we needed some numbers from the government....to fill out THEIR document.  So after two e-mails that were never answered, I found a number to call.  I sat on hold for 1/2 hour to be told that my birthday wasn't right in their computer....not my fault, but I scanned my passport and sent it back to them....via e-mail which they never replied to.  The next day I sat on hold for another 1/2 hour and they gave me the info I needed.  So I filled out the document.

I was then told by our agency that they (government) should've sent me a confirmation letter.  Monday I called for a third time and another 1/2 hour on hold to be told that now E's birthday was wrong in their computer and they didn't want to talk to me.  To which I got a little riled up. 

What you don't know is that Tuesday is the day that paperwork gets submitted to the US Embassy in Ethiopia.  So if we didn't want to wait another week, it needed done now.  Basically we resigned ourselves to not getting into Embassy.  We were told that they would take our papers with them and plead our case.

So I woke up Tuesday morning to find an e-mail from the US Embassy saying that our paperwork was accepted!!!!  Thank you Lord!  I just don't think I could've taken much more.  I was so frustrated.

Beyond just us though....2 other families who we're friends with and also had paper problems also got in on Tuesday too.  I was probably as happy for them as for us. 

So what's next?  We wait.  More.  Longer.  The Embassy now researches E's story. And at some point in the future they tell us to come get him.

So out of all of this, I have been profoundly impressed by this:  I know you're reading our blog right now....probably because you know us.  But there are a bunch of other families who are as stuck and hurting as we are.  Some we know and keep in touch with.  Some we don't know.  They're crying at night because they're seeing their child grow up via pictures without them.  They're gritting their teeth when they sleep.  They're clenching their fists.  They're putting on a good face when people ask them "if they've heard anything or when's he coming home".  They're hurting.  All the while...they're jumping through ridiculous hoops only to be put on the back burner. 

I say this because from day one this blog has been about sharing with you not just our story....but the story of adoption.  It's not always pretty or happy.  While we rejoice with friends that we all got in this week....none of us probably should have....and others probably didn't. 

So this week as you pray for us (please continue to do so, because we're still desperately in need of your prayers) please pray for some other families in the midst of waiting. 


Finally...in the midst of a frustrating week, we got new pictures of E. 
On one hand it's good to see him.  It's good to see his half smile.  It also hurts me to my core.  He's not in my house.  He's not half smiling with toys from our play room.  He's not here.  He needs to come home now.